Hey Fitties! Sorry I missed you yesterday, it was another crazy day of lawyering. I’m finding it difficult at times to serve two masters.  The highlight of yesterday was picking up a delicious Vegan chocolate chip cookie from Dover Natural, the love of my health food store shopping life.  If you’re in Dover, NH, stop in and say hi to Michelle and Kim and they will direct you to these cookies (Wednesday is baking day, so if you want one warm out of the oven, I recommend stopping by in the afternoon). They are the perfect juxtaposition of crispiness and softness. Or go to the juice bar and ask Brad for “The Elizabeth.” It’s lemon, apple, celery, parsley, ginger cucumber juice. It’s like a refreshing shower for your colon cells.

Less of a highlight:

Underarm waxing.  It is as awful as it sounds.  On the other hand, my underarms are smooth as a baby’s behind.  This is useful for people like me who spend an hour a day in tank tops with their hands in the air like they just don’t care.  Hopefully I’ll be able to share my tips and choreography with you guys using the magic of streaming and inexpensive video cameras. However, I’m incredibly self-conscious about how I look (particularly on camera) so while my technical adviser works out the details of the camera stuff I’m going to fret about armpit stubble.  That’s how I roll. I used to think I was vain, but then I realized if I were really vain I’d spend more than 5 minutes putting on my makeup.  I’m really just neurotic. Self-diagnosed, of course.

So one thing I hope to be able to feature here are grooming tips for instructors or students who want to look fresh and fly in classes.  There are plenty (PLENTY) of makeup blogs out there.  I love this one cuz she does Queen Chalene’s makeup and she’s into glitter for realz. I’m no makeup expert. I love the idea of makeup and I buy it but then I hate to put it on. I just want to look at the pretty packages of color.  But if I pick up some tips about looking your best as an instructor, I’ll pass them on.

Tip number 1: Get rid of your armpit stubble.  It hurts like a mo fo, I’m sorry. But it does look nice.  Obviously, you can teach with armpit stubble but you feel sassier with denuded pits. Also, you don’t have to plan your shaving days. You understand what I mean by shaving days? I can’t shave today because I definitely have to shave tomorrow for class and if I shave two days in a row I’ll get razor bumps? Anyone else strategize their shaving this way?

Tip number 2: Buy this mascara.  Neutrogena Healthy Lengths mascara makes my eyelashes look like I’ve got fake lashes on.  It’s also sweat-proof. Please note that not all waterproof mascaras are actually sweat-proof.  Sweat is technically not water. It has a different pH and chemical composition than water. Or something.  I’ve tried the (crazy ridiculous expensive) Dior Show and hated it.  The brush was way too big for my puny little lashes so I just ended up with glops of mascara everywhere. It’s a very “wet” mascara, so I had to keep wiping off the excess product on a tissue before I could use it, which hurt me because it was so expensive. And it ran like crazy. But it certainly was impervious to water — I couldn’t wash it off for the life of me.  It’s the one time Queen Chalene steered me wrong — she loves it, I loathe it. All her other advice is correct though.

The Healthy Lengths stays put and doesn’t run and I’ll make a confession: I just leave it on my lashes and I don’t take it off.  Since it doesn’t run, I can walk around for 2-3 days with mascara remnants on my lashes. I told you I was lazy about makeup.

Okay, that’s all for now! You got grooming tips? Share ’em! I need all the help I can get!